Sex is supposed to be a pleasurable activity between individuals who feel attracted to each other. There may be love involved in most situations, but sometimes there may simply be a strong attraction. Whatever be the case, you would not want a night of pleasure to scar you or your partner for life or leave you with countless embarrassing trips to your doctor’s clinic, would you?
Just like physical and mental wellbeing is important, sexual wellbeing is also extremely important to be able to live a well-rounded life.
What Is Sexual Wellbeing?
- Sexual wellbeing entails having a respectful approach towards sexual relationships and sexuality.
- It also involves taking steps to ensure that the experience is safe, healthy and pleasurable for both partners.
- A sexually healthy individual is one who can enjoy a healthy and satisfying sexual relationship while being respectful of their partner. Such a state is not an isolated experience and requires the person to have a healthy mind and body.
- A sexually healthy individual is able to lead a contended, relaxed and wholesome life.
This does not mean that those who choose not to have intimate relationships are losing out on something. It’s just a matter of personal choice.
How Does One Become Sexually Healthy?
While eating healthy and maintaining an active lifestyle does enhance the experience, intercourse is about two people. You cannot isolate one person in the experience while evaluating the whole equation.
1. Practice Good Personal Hygiene
Imagine your reaction to someone who smells bad or looks dirty. You wouldn’t want the same reaction from someone else for you, would you? Maintaining good personal hygiene not only helps you stay clean but also makes you feel good about yourself.
It helps you feel fresh and feel confident about your appearance. Don’t you feel conscious about how your hair looks when you haven’t shampooed for a week? How would you feel when you get caught in an intimate moment when you look or feel like that?
Bad odours and residue can not only be a big turn off but can also be harmful to you and your partner’s health. It can cause urinary tract infections and unexpected reactions during the act.
You want your partner to feel good thinking about the night you spent together rather than them throwing up every time they picture it.
Ensure you take a bath every day and keep your intimate areas clean and dry. Wear comfortable and clean undergarments every day and change them whenever you feel they have become soiled.
Use natural deodorants or roll-ons to eliminate the odour of sweat, especially if you tend to sweat a lot.
If your partner, a friend, or a family member hugs you, help it be a pleasant experience.
2. Keep It Covered
As much as “it does not feel the same” with a condom on, always use one, especially if you haven’t been with your partner long enough to ensure that you both are exclusive.
Condoms do not only act as contraceptives but also help you keep STDs (Sexually Transmitted Diseases) away by containing body fluids. Learn the correct way to put on a condom and complement it with a good lube to make it comfortable for you as well as your partner. While picking a condom, always pick a latex one without allergens in it.
If you use a condom during sex, you are not only covered from the risk of unwanted pregnancies (except for broken condoms), but you can also enjoy the experience without having to worry about withdrawing on time.
3. Limit Your Sexual Partners
While the question of “how many sexual partners have you had before” does pop up at the beginning of relationships, this time try doing it without judgment. Realize that the motivation behind this process is not to judge your partner’s character but to ensure that you are not at the risk of any infections.
While you make your partner feel awkward, ensure you tell them about your sexual partners as well.
One important step towards good sexual wellbeing is to ensure that you maintain exclusivity. You may never know who a carrier is, as not all STDs have clear symptoms. You might put yourself and your partner at a risk by getting involved with multiple partners.
Even if you and your partner are in an open relationship, set some ground rules.
4. Be Considerate and Respectful. Always
You might not like to do something and would not want to be forced about it. The same applies to your partner as well. If they express their dislike about something, do not try to coax them into doing it.
A NO means a NO. Do not ask multiple times in the hopes of getting a yes.
If it’s something completely harmless like tickling your partner gently, you might still playfully approach it but if you still get a NO, step back. You may never know why your partner dislikes something. To you, it might be something silly but it might bring back horrifying memories, you may never know.
Respect your partner’s boundaries. It is your responsibility to make them comfortable with you, and give them wonderful memories to remember rather than to give them scars.
If it bothers you a lot, talk it out, so you know why they do not like it.
5. Communicate at Every Opportunity You Get
Yes, this does involve sex. Communicate with your partner if you like some of your moves, and they will do them more. Also, let them know if something is unpleasant and ask them to stop.
Communicate beyond the bedroom too as that’s how you get to know your partner and connect with them emotionally and intellectually. While a reckless night might seem exciting, making love to someone you have a true connection with, can feel even more fulfilling.
It is best to know a person before you get into bed with them. We don’t mean to judge you, but that’s how you get enough time to talk about exclusivity or other sexual partners as well, which in turn helps you enjoy a healthy sex life.
6. Refrain from Sex If Your Partner Is Unable to Walk Straight
If you and your partner or your date have had too much to drink, and your partner is unable to walk straight, they are probably not in the state to make sound decisions as well.
Consent is extremely important and a necessary prerequisite of having healthy sexual relationships and your own sexual wellbeing.
After a night of drunken lovemaking, you do not want to wake up to lawsuits against you or the guilt of having taken advantage of someone’s senselessness.
In the end, it feels good and satisfying when you and your partner are both satisfied, doesn’t it? Try to think of ways to achieve that and always keep your partner’s interests in mind while doing so.
Plan a surprise, go away for a weekend, make them feel like they are the center of the universe, and let a magical night follow.
Ensure you have washed up, have a tube of lube, have condoms ready, and remember what he or she loves the most. Make it a night both of you will remember with a smile and some good goosebumps.